Friday, June 12, 2009
Does it make me cynical if I think that this isn't so much music education as karaoke prep for their drunken 20's and 30's? No, OK good. Because it also reminded me how pissed I used to get at my peers in my 5th grade chorus who would over enunciate and make exaggerated mouth movements during "Feeling Groovy". So annoying.
No, I'm just kidding. This is awesome.
Have a super weekend, everybody.
Whedon in his Dollhouse.
So The Movie Blog told me that Ain't it Cool News told them that Entertainment Weekly said that Joss Whedon is taking a huge bird-flipping pass at any involvement with the new Buffy movie that's been so whined about (and rightfully so!) over the Interweb for the last few weeks. EW also reported that only 3% of those polled would actually pay to see such an abomination as a Whedonless Buffy movie made by the same husband and wife team (Fran & Kaz Kuzui) that made the original movie. Presumably this is because those two made a film that didn't actually resemble Whedon's original script, cast Luke Perry and wasted the awesome cult following power of both Rutger Hauer AND Paul Reubens. Perhaps this means the Kuzui's are doomed in their efforts and we will be spared yet another remake, relaunch and/or re-imaging - which is a really really good thing.
Egged on by the successful relaunches of Batman and Star Trek, it seems that Hollywood has officially run out of original ideas. Pelham 123, really? Just for fun, I've picked through the list of remakes recently compiled by the wonderful folks over at Den of Geek but deleted any relevant information and added my own 2 cents, just for you, fair readers . Aren't we lucky!!
Drop Dead Fred
Starring Russel Brand. Mainstream America here he comes...again.
Videodrome, Barbarella & Highlander
These remakes could be fun, given the advancement of special effects. Also, we now have computer generated actors that can replicate Christopher Lambert's technique exactly. There can be only one.
No. Back off Hollywood. You might as well remake Star Wars...oh right.
It says here that people under 22 don't know who I am and yet these glasses are totally back in style.
Hmmm, is there a male star today who is Fletchworthy? Rumor is Joshua Jackson (Dawson's Creek) is in talks. Yeah, that's right, "Who?" Should be awesome.
Flight Of The Navigator
I actually showed up to the audition for this film way back when, only to find out that they were only auditioning boys. It always bothered me that the kid they chose way way more girly than me. Fame, you are a merciless bitch.
Cliffhanger & Judge Dredd
One can never get enough Stallone, right?
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
I'm actually down with this one, but only if Feldman can voice Donatello, cause he was the shit.
Daredevil & Tomb Raider
I don't think I could care about two movies less than these two.
That's right, you might know the original as Predator. See how they did that with the "s"? Clever.
Even Peter Sellers is not safe. But, I'm sure it will be awesome as long as Steve Martin plays the Sellers role. That formula is fool proof!
Creature From The Black Lagoon & The Thing
Sure, why not, as long as Sam Jackson is in both.
Insert witty word play here.
The Shadow & The Phantom
These movies blew, despite the awesomeness of Alec Baldwin and Billy Zane respectively. It didn't help that these two characters don't have much of a draw with today's crazy kids.
Romancing The Stone
Who's going to be Danny DeVito? A plumped up Seth Green?
This is a stupid idea.
Masters Of The Universe
This is a really stupid idea, BUT Courtney Cox might be available for a cameo.
This classic series starring Jessica Alba and that creepo from Nip Tuck...wait a minute...
A Nightmare On Elm Street
All I remember is Johnny Depp being propelled all over the ceiling and a of blood and that I could not take a bath (or sleep) for a week after seeing the original in 86' or so when I was 9. Great choice for a slumber party movie Mrs. McCallister!
Clash Of The Titans
Yay! Now it can be reborn and will most likely creep out a whole new generation! Bad stop animation (and Harry Hamlin's chin) was my generations uncanny valley. Something is just not right.
Go for it. Rich drunks are awesome! But I don't quite see Russel Brand in the Dudley Moore role, sorry.
Girls Just Want To Have Fun
Where will they ever find someone as perky and annoying as classic Sarah Jessica Parker? Disney Channel alum, get ready!
Buffy The Vampire Slayer
This will be awesome, but they need to replace all that glitter at the dance at the end with Jonas brother foam canons. But, I'm sure they've already added that to the script.
So, I wonder which Communist countries are going to invade America in this version? Go Wolverines!!
Little Shop of Horrors
The real question is will it be straight a la Corman or a musical a la Oz? The other also real question is why redo this in the first place? (Dah-dah-dah-dah-dah - dah-oooh.)
Know what else? I left like 20 movies off the list. Have any to share with the class?
Sources: Den of Geek,
We Are Movie Geeks, The Movie Blog