Wow, it's been a busy week. Lots to process. But have no fear, I'm here to break it down old skool style for you, fair readers and I'm gonna slip in some awesomely important Interweb things you might have missed because you have to do something called "work" like 9 hours a day before leaving and then going to a place called "home" where, oddly enough, more "work" awaits. Don't mess with my American dream, buddy, 'cause I will cut you.
Yay, it's Friday!
Obama wins one of them Nobel Peace prizes for basically showing up for work.
Punctuality and accountability are super important at the office and can take you a long way towards promotions an stuff. Usually accolades are held off until you've been at your job for awhile, then you start getting shitty tokens from bossman, like a paperweight, a clock or a 2% raise. Or, you can be at your job for like 8 months and get one of the most respected awards around. I'm sure that nearly a year spent running this venerable nation in the middle of an orchestrated economic crisis and a few wars is just as deserving a feat as some of the past winners' achievements. I'm mean what does Nelson Mandela, Doctors Without Borders and psht...Al Gore have on the POTUS. Yeah, that's right, so...I'm not sure the wording on this but...haters better step off. Wait - does that sound right?
NASA Apparently Still Exists
Reading the plans of NASA and their newly restored love affair with The Moon was frankly like reading The Onion. A manned moon base? Um, yeah, sure that totally sounds realistic NASA, I'm all for it. Of course the obvious first step would be to shove a probe down the Moon's "throat" , right? And so they did this morning, and it was extremely unspectacular. Maybe it would have been more exciting if they hadn't billed it as a moon "bombing" and went with a spacier term like "probe launching". Sci-Fi is so hot right now.
Tracy Morgan Joins Twitter
The Twitter community twatted a collective sigh of relief when Tracy Jordan, I mean Morgan, finally, finally, joined Twitter. Here is a collection of his most recent posts so far (newest first, for those of you that don't Tweet).
Prepare to be inspired.
- Just got in the house. Feeling tired from working 30 Rock. Getting ready to crash. Good night my loves.
- Im a good parent so ill induce the labor
- The wait is over! The black Svengali has arrived! I'm on the street turning good girls bad and getting them pregnant!!!
- my dickhead is shaped liked a darth vadar helmet. my dick is so fat it looks like r2d2.
The Interweb Thinks You're Awesome
Why not give it a high-five?
YES! A Response to LOLCats
Check out AverageCats.com, they're not trying to be like those a-hole LolCats. They're just trying to make it in this mixed up crazy world and can't really be bothered worrying about whether you LOL or not, man. Lay off, them. Jeez.
Lastly, Community (NBC, 8pm EST, Thurs nights!)...which you should be watching 'cause it has great writing.
What else are you going to watch, Sherri on Lifetime? Bones? The Vampire Diaries. No, you're not, so watch Joel and Chevy. They're good people.